THE DO’S & DON’TS OF LISBON
(AND PORTUGAL)
Do - Purchase A Picnic Blanket
Lisbon’s predominantly mild to warm often sunny climate means many months of ideal picnic weather. And we take full advantage. All the green spaces in and around the city become havens for groups of friends, families, couples and solo hangs. Grab your blanket, some snacks, maybe a bottle of wine, a book or a card game, and watch your local park turn into your favourite place to chill.
Do - Eat Dinner Later
Tourist traps aside, forget going to dinner at 7 or 7.30, unless you want to be the only ones in the place. Dinner is usually after 8, even 9pm is common. You can usually get a 10pm reservation if you want, especially on weekends, though it’s not as prevalent as it is over the border.
This late dinner time makes sense when you consider that lunch is a proper meal rather than a quick sandwich, and in the summer there’s still early evening sunshine to enjoy.
Also, the Portuguese do love a decent snack. When you’re getting antsy at 4 or 5 pm, it's time for lanche. Sounding suspiciously like “lunch”, lanche is a pit-stop snack-attack designed to tide you over until meal-time. But we don't mean a handful of dry nuts. Think of it more like afternoon tea, where you have a sweet or savoury pastries with a cuppa. Do as the portuguese do, head to the padaria, cafe or quiosque and get a torrada (thick buttered toast) or any variety of fried snack you will see in the display case, like pasteis de bacalhau (cod fish cakes) or go the sweet route with a little pastry or cake like my favourite, queque.
Do - Get Friendly
Like in most of southern Europe, when greeting friends physical contact of some level is usually involved. While this comes naturally to some, it seems prudent to warn people who aren’t that way inclined.
Men greeting men usually hug and pat one another on the back. At the very least they’ll do a handshake with one hand while doing the reach around back pat with the other at the same time.
Women-to-women and men-to-women usually do a kiss on each cheek. Some of my portuguese friends and I will usually throw in a full body hug also, but that takes time and familiarity (and is by no means expected).
It’s not as complicated as I've made it sound. Don’t overthink it, just go with the flow.
Do - Get A Bit Loosey Goosey With Punctuality
The Portuguese have a relaxed attitude when it comes to punctuality, some lateness is common.
It’s also acceptable to be advised of plans last-minute. Don’t try and plan weeks in advance for dinner together.
When on your way to meet someone, you may be used to dropping an sms that you’re “just in uber now”, for example. Don’t expect this from the portuguese. They know, that you know, they’re coming…so what’s the point of this? Little things like this add up to a more laid-back way of life. Just trust that they’ll turn up. Eventually.
Do - Keep Any Extremist Views To Yourself
Debating and moaning about politics might be normal where you’re from, but here, it’s kept to a minimum. Since I’ve been here, Portugal has been changing from their centre-left status, slipping to the right, but extremist views - whichever way you lean - are not as welcome here as they can seem to be elsewhere. Are we living in some sucky-ass times? Yes. But life is still for living, so when you're with your friends, keep aggressive political views out of it and enjoy eachothers company.
Do - Ditch your leggings
Yeah, sorry to tell you, they’re not pants. At least not here. If you’ve arrived from a country where athleisure wear is standard attire when running about town, you’ll be tempted to push back on this. Until you’re the only one in leggings at the grocery store, the post office or the dentist reception and you feel a bit out of place. I got a few odd looks before realising what it was about. Gym gear here is, well, for the gym.
Look, this isn’t Milan and this isn’t Tokyo - no one's expecting you to make a statement every time you leave the house. Infact, there really isn’t a whole lot of flamboyance in fashion here. If you’re wanting to embrace this city's sartorial style, a smart-but-relaxed look is how Lisboetas go about their everyday life.
Do - Shop Local
Far be it for me to tell you how to spend your money, but if you only take one point from this list, make it this. As foreigners who’ve made this country their home, for however long, we should be conscious of how our money goes into the community. The independent, family-run talhos (butchers) and fruterias (fruitshops) appreciate your money more than Auchan or Lidl does. I love these places. In Australia, they all but died out because of everyone doing their entire shop at the big companies. A benefit to you is how it helps you integrate, and makes Lisbon your home. You may not speak fluently, but you’ll be greeted with a welcome only familiarity can bring, not just with the shopkeepers, but your other neighbors. You will be a part of your local community.
I have my usual local places to shop, but please let me know yours! I would love to make a guide covering more than just my neighborhood!
I also suggest buying local items over imported ones. Why buy kiwi fruit sent all the way from New Zealand when the Portuguese ones are right there? Renoa can wipe your tush just as well as Scottex can. Swap your Lindt for Regina next time your craving chocolate and see how it holds up. There’s a wide array of portuguese cheese to sample. Part of the joy of a new place is this low level, low risk exploration!
I believe in this so much that I am currently making a comprehensive list for you of Portuguese brands to dabble with, so stay tuned!
Do - Eat Local
This concept also goes for restaurants. In a perfect world, all small businesses would thrive, but it pains me to see foreigners lining up outside for brunch (a concept that did not exist here just a few years ago) or the hottest new expat venture, when a local ma & pa restaurant is next door, half empty. Look, I’m not here to put a kibosh on bagels or waffles - I crave a good flatwhite coffee as much as the next guy - but please remember to spread your money around. Have lunch at a local tasca this week. Or get a pastry from a local padaria today, the Danish-owned coffee chain will be fine.
If you’re feeling a bit lost, the YLB food section has different lists on where to eat. It also all the guides to decode what’s what in portuguese cuisine so you can order with confidence.
Do Not - Skip Dessert
As in much of Europe, dessert is not a treat, it’s the natural ending to any dinner and even lunch. Just a casual meal at a tasca, a churrasqueria, or a light supper at a mate’s house will come with the expectation of something sweet, even if it’s just a simple chocky mousse or pudim. Don’t resist it. Life’s short, have the sobremesa. And if you wanna be really local, get that late night espresso to go with it.
Do Not -Push Hustle Culture
Remember how in the good old days we used to leave work at 5.30pm on the dot and were pretty much left alone ‘till 9am the next morning? Nights and weekends were all yours to do as you please. Well that’s still alive and well here. Work/life balance is cherished, and they want to keep it that way. You may not work in an office, you probably work remotely or for yourself, which is not at all considered a bad thing, but The Hustle and The Grind mindset is not a flex here.
Do Not - Assume You’ll Learn Portuguese By Osmosis
I truly thought most of the Portuguese I would learn would be just from hearing it on a regular basis. I could not have been more wrong.
You’ll be grateful to know a large portion of Lisboetas speak English and will use it with you willingly, but the downside is you won’t be forced to use the national language.
Add to that, European Portuguese isn’t as easy as you probably expect, nor is it as easy as other romance languages due to it being one of the few that is time-based (instead of syllable-based), which makes the separate words harder to discern as they run them together. So you’re going to have to put in the work, baby.
Go to our language page to help you get started. Just don’t do my next point…
Do Not -Speak Spanish To The Portuguese
The quickest way to piss off any Portuguese person is to speak to them in Spanish. And rightfully so. It’s not just ignorant, it’s disrespectful to treat the two nations as interchangeable. They are two separate countries with two separate cultures and two separate languages that don’t even sound alike to the ear. Save your paella and sangria binges for your jaunts over the border.
Do Not -Flash Your Foreign Financial Status
Portugal’s gross domestic product per capita is one of the lowest among wealthy nations. Unemployment is an issue and the average salary is significantly lower than their neighbouring countries, most of continental europe, and, depending on where you're from, very likely, yours. Like in many cultures, it’s inappropriate to ask how much someone earns or what something they have cost, even among friends. No matter the income, they are always hospitable.
I am conscious with my portuguese friends on the lower income bracket to suggest activities that are inexpensive (there’s that picnic blanket again) and to eat/drink at affordable places. It doesn’t have to cost a lot to hang out.
My portuguese friends that are on decent and higher incomes are generous but not flashy. They dress well without turning themselves into a human billboard for designer logos. Quality is key, well-polished is ideal, but flashy is trashy.
Do Not - Expect Smoke Free Dining Outside
If you’re a smoker, you’ll be delighted to find you can smoke anywhere alfresco. Even if you're practically rubbing elbows with the table next to you.
For those of us who don’t smoke, you’ll be the opposite of delighted, and it will take some getting used to. What choice do you have? Eat indoors on a sunny day? Nope. Second hand smoke is the prato do dia.
There is a very small but growing trend with some modern cafe’s banning smoking in communal areas but for the most part, you’re out-numbered. This is a smoker's city, as is evident as soon as you look down - every street, sidewalk and pavement seems to be one big dirty ashtray. And if you do smoke, put your butts out responsibly, that shit gets washed down the drains and into the ocean. The city may not belong to us foreigners, but the planet belongs to everyone.
Note: If you know of any smoke-free alfresco places, please get in touch, I’d love to make a list.
Do Not -Expect Logic with Bureaucratic, Public or Utility Services
I’ve saved the worst till last. It’s the most wide-spread complaint about Portugal, even by the Portuguese. Every system is either downright nonsensical, bogged down or completely broken.
What you were told officially yesterday, is no longer true today. Paperwork that isn’t required suddenly will be (Bestie Tip: Always take EVERY document you have, no matter how insignificant you think it might be).
Something that should be standardised in one office alone, like payment options, can differ based solely on who’s counter you're at and what mood they’re in (true story).
Required appointments are impossible to get, even when it means your visa will expire so you're stuck until they get around to it many months later (true story x 100000).
If you have somewhere important in the city to be, this will be one of the many times a regular train you’ve caught plenty of times before simply won’t turn up. No reason given (true story). Or there’s a strike that day (true story). Or there’s a fire at the substation (true story). Or the wind is blowing in the wrong direction (okay, not true, but you get the idea).
It’s no secret Lisbon Airport is a total mess. When catching a flight, plan ahead for the utter debacle of just getting into the airport entrance for drop off. If flying outside the EU, know that only 2 out of 15 immigration desks will be staffed, even at the height of peak season, even though they have the data on all inbound/outbound flights. The recent introduction of electronic gates has been an absolute disaster.
There’s no real way to game the system. And there’s no one in any of these departments to help you with a legitimate problem. We’re all in this alone, together. I’d like to say you’ll get used to it. You won’t. But you do have to learn to live with it, or else you’ll go bonkers. Take it as an opportunity to push the boundaries of your patience to extremes you never thought possible. Remind yourself this is simply the cost of the no-fks-given vibe of the city you love. Take up mediation and set your expectations accordinglly. By that, I mean have none.
Welcome to your new life! In a new city. In a new country. Perhaps a new continent.
Moving anywhere different means you will come across things you may be unaccustomed to, confused by or even downright frustrated with. On the flip side, there’s also a lot of wonderful new things to discover and quirks to embrace. Here is a short guide of what to do and what to avoid, to help give you an understanding on what to expect and help you adjust as smoothly as possible.